Gone In 60 Seconds… (devil in the details)

IMG_8901Quick steps… are her companions, heels clicking, echoing the sound of pride

Laying waste to monochromatic thoughts, taking residence where she did not previously reside

My breath quickened, synchronizing with the colorful rhythm of her purposeful pace
Tenacious glances, akin to reckless deviance registering across my face
Mesmerized, minutes tiptoeing quietly by, never once achieving acknowledgment by me
Hips sashay with dangerous curves, rivaled only by the corners of a curious smile to be
Hem of her miniskirt riding high above her thighs, fluent at sarcasm and profanity
A bachelors thoughts blazoned across my mind, stretching the fabric of my own sanity
I, curious pupil aiming for honor roll status, studying unspoken words of the master teacher
With perfect pitch/diction, she rounds the corner with an over the shoulder glance…
Disappearing into my past, leaving me a spectator in my own mind’s own little aluminum bleacher

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The Relationship Diet

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Relationship1. dependence, alliance, kinship. 2. affinity, consanguinity. Relationship, kinship refer to connection with others by blood or by marriage. Relationship can be applied to connection either by birth or by marriage: relationship to a ruling family. Kinship generally denotes common descent and implies a more intimate connection than relationship: the ties and obligations of kinship.

 

Diet – A prescribed course of eating and drinking in which the amount and kind of food, as well as the times at which it is to be taken, are regulated for therapeutic purposes. A specific allowance or selection of food, especially prescribed to control weight or in disorders in which certain foods are contraindicated: a. salt-free diet; a. 900-calorie diet b. (as modifier): a diet bread.

In our current society there is never an occasion whereas an individual is not on a diet of some sort. Either the diet is specifically correlated to an expected outcome or it is an indirect method of dieting that directly stems from a chosen lifestyle.     More often than not, our diets are chosen by the lives we lead and the decisions we make in relation to that lifestyle. Concurrently, the relationships that we involve ourselves in, regardless of the slow deliberation we use to comfort ourselves in the moment of truth (actual decision), is subject to the indirect dieting lifestyle.

A relationship is only as strong as the sum of its parts and the nurturing that is involved (diet). The relationship, the union or connectedness of two people (romance) or more (family/friends) will either remain healthy or devolve into sickness.   They will either use growing problems as a sign that will either propel them into becoming solution-oriented or the problems will go unchecked and devolve into an imminent demise.

Today, we are just as aware of the things that are good for us as we are the things that are bad for us. However, bad habits, poor self control, low emotional I.Q., and in many cases stubbornness plague our relationships just as high fat, high cholesterol, too much sugar and little to no exercise harm our bodies.   Passive aggressive tendencies can be just as sweet and toxic to relationships as sugars and high fructose corn syrups are to our physical selves. When trust issues define how the other party in the relationship must change or re-invent themselves to meet growing emotional demands to feel individual comfort, you both become a part of high fat, high sugar diet.   These behaviors tend to slow the progress of a once healthy relationship, as it becomes fat, lazy and over-indulgent, making the relationship sick. When stubbornness (low mobility) results in romantic stagnation, the health is leeched from the relationship. The unhealthy fat takes over and affects all of the organs of the relationship body. This is the same as failing to maintain a healthy lifestyle and allowing the organs of the body to become sick. In these cases, a temporary fix is introduced to fix whichever body system(s) have come under attack. Metformin (diabetes), Paxil (depression), Lasix (high blood pressure) and et cetera.   Conversely passive aggressive behavior (stubbornness), consistent needs for reassurance (insecurities), angry outbursts as a tool of correction (feelings of sadness), and others only helps the perpetrator for a moment. However, the organs: heart (for feelings of love), eyes (for seeing worth) are getting sicker. In cases such as these, something has to be changed or removed (with precision in some cases) to correct an overly damaged situation. Regardless of how much we know about the requirements for physical and relationship health, we still get in our own way and impede our own longevity and/or success. The relationship becomes the sacrificial lamb that dies on the alter of stubbornness and insecurity. We need to wake up and save ourselves from ourselves as well as the ones that we love before we drown in a sea of our own regrets. We are then force to live with the overwhelming burning sensation within the desire for a second chance. Have you ever heard anyone say, “I wish I knew then, what I know now”?   This is the anthem of those who refused to set themselves up for the success they desired through a high fat, high sugar diet and very little exercise (effort).

 

 

 

 

Scary Metal Box

Scary Metal Box

I pressed the button to summon the elevator as three other people arrived next to me. The doors opened and four strangers became even stranger… “weird” even. No one would make eye contact with the other. One person stared at her phone, the two others watched the numbers announce each passing floor. Suddenly, I realized I was watching them. Everyone looked uncomfortable as if their deepest, darkest secret was about to be revealed to the group. I suppressed my desire to chuckle as I noticed each person become more and more withdrawn as the seconds passed. I wanted to suddenly shout, “BOO”!!! However, the elevator doors opened and every passengers’ freedom was just on the other side. I’ll get ’em next time. LOL!!!

“That Which You Believe…”

If you decide to do something that was poorly conceived, offensive to others, but without malicious intent… it’s the other party’s issue and you have no responsibility in the transaction. To boil that down, it tells me that you take no responsibility in your actions if it turns out that you were just doing “You”.

If I were to follow your logic, it would suggest that the world is a chaotic place that operates on a linear plane and things occur for no good reason especially where you are involved. If I were to simplify this perceived belief, then it also suggests that “Cause and Effect” are not linked in your world and everything occurs within it’s own little compartment. This frightens me about you. It makes me afraid to trust your logic and/or judgment.

Groupthink

GROUPTHINK – a pattern of thought characterized by self-deception, forced manufacture of consent, and conformity to group values and ethics.

We must be discerning with whom we align ourselves with in terms of friends and acquaintances. The more we relate to those that are without the ability to challenge us and are seemingly a reflection of ourselves, the more accepting we become of their opinions and behaviors. In this state is where we are most reluctant to learn and therefore we force ourselves not to grow. As we join ourselves to them, we become more trusting and lose sight of that which is most detrimental… our singular identity. It perfectly acceptable to find comfort in those that are like-minded, but to avoid the failure of not growing personally, you must challenge those around you to grow continuously while also expecting your efforts to be vigorously and equally reciprocated. As we all endeavor to grow the person that we were yesterday into a person strong and prepared for tomorrow, we must remember that variety in your circle of friends and acquaintances will serve to offer varying perspective and real life learning that will shape the voice that we use to speak affirmations to ourselves. Willfully or unwittingly choosing to experience life surrounded by those that agree with us without wavering and those that support our flights of fancy will reduce us to life on a hamster wheel, beleaguered with recurring and familiar conundrums. We must grasp your individual identity while avoiding the rigidity of having an unwavering point of view, echoed by our chosen brand of “Yes Men”. This is the place where loyal takes the place of love and “Group Think” is born.
Archie - Groupthink

“War Within…”

Eyes closed in retaliation to the maddening thoughts threatening the sanity that was once taken for granted.

Heartbeat racing to meet the pulse’s tireless rhythm. Ears drawn to the harmony of her hastening footsteps announcing the arrival of perfect legs, intoxicating backside and honey-sweet smile.
Recently memories and events haunt the thoughts of a trepidatious “Me” causing an amnesic effect and losing grip on what was once imagined as perfect.
Real or imagined actions defines her character as I peer over the edge into darkness and the unknown. Fond memories of yesteryear are like the wind pushing at my back, threatening to destroy what once was and that which can be. My spirit is darkened, but thirsty… reaches out toward her familiar whisper that ferries her gentle words to me.
My arms extended toward her, hands balled into fists like that of warring pugilists, striking out against the passing minutes until a final decision is announced.
Flames in my chest burn… fueled by confusion and silent rage. Anger, unrelenting… disarmed by a simple, but sweet and ethereal smile. Hearts remained intertwined, ushering us back toward desires for each other.
Finally, our fingers touch and breathing becomes erratic. Hearts are thundering as her hand reaches inside of my reluctant grasp. We hold on to each other for dear life as tears race down our cheeks because more than anything we know we need each other.